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Writer's pictureJessica Peer

Where's your head at?

This morning I found myself listening to Otis Reading's (Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay and I couldn't help but feel the intensity of his words. My interpretation of Otis' lyrics links to my inner feelings towards modern day life. We work ourselves to the bone unknowingly ignoring the present day. We inadvertently over analyse and over process our daily interactions causing distress and trauma to our psyche. Our mental health takes a beating every day.


But what if we spoke to ourselves in a kinder fashion? What if we took time to recognise these damaging thoughts and replace them with positive loving words?


Mindfulness can be defined as being aware of our current situation within our bodies; emotional body, mental body, spiritual body and physical body. When we neglect, intentionally or unintentionally, one of these bodies we become imbalanced. An imbalance can lead to irritable behaviour, damaging inner stories and other antisocial behaviours. 


In this post, I want to focus on the mental body and how we speak to ourselves. First question, do you tell yourself that you love yourself? What internal stories are on repeat? Do you use loving and positive language when internally processing the day? 


It's easy to repeat known internal stories such as 'more (insert material goods) will make me feel better', 'I'm not beautiful', 'I don't deserve (insert emotional/mental/spiritual/physical need)', rather than having a deep meaningful conversation with ourselves to identify why we communicate with ourselves in that fashion. 


So where do we start? The first step is to identify the personality/internal story that is on repeat. Let's start by setting the scene in order to get comfortable with feeling 'the feels'. Find a quiet space and make it your own. Whether it is locking yourself in the bathroom or a cuddled up in your bed, create a space that is just for you. Add treasures that extract the intention and amplify the vibes you want to inhabit. For example, in my bathroom, I have Rose Quartz Tea Light Candle Holders (a bargain find for £5 find off Facebook Market Place) and a home-made room spray which contains Rosemary and Frankincense essential oils. Rosemary is known for it's grounding aromas where Frankincense is linked to uplifting your mood.


Before locking the door or diving deep under those covers grab a pencil or pen, a few blank pages and let's start that dialogue with yourself. Connect your writing utensil to paper and release. Let your words flow. Start writing a letter as if you were writing to your best friend, your soulmate or your twin soul. There is no judgement and no restrictions while your words flow. If you feel the need to curse, curse. Take it easy on yourself and just let your words flow.

If you find yourself stuck, let's do a brain dump. Write a list of the situations, incidents and issues that triggered your inner story. Start with a point form list identifying what was triggered followed by how you felt. Keep writing until you can't write any more. There is no 'amount' that you need to reach. This practice is what is suitable for you. One day your list may feel like it never ends others it may be one or two points. Both are totally okay. This practice is what is best for you. It's about removing those unhealthy thoughts and repairing our thought processes and replacing with positive inner stories.


These pages, whether loose, in a journal or on your tablet, are where you can be honest about your inner stories, which may be difficult to vocalise aloud. As your words have now travelled from your head to your paper consider them out in the open, no longer inside to fester and dismantle our positive outlook. 


Should you want to take it one step further, adding a little extra magic to your journey, take your piece of paper and fold it into a palm-size piece of paper. In a safe area like your kitchen sink, fire pit or cast iron cauldron and with no other flammable objects around, light your letter on fire. As the fire grows hose damaging notions become ash and no longer exist in physical form. The words contained in the letter raise with the smoke and are released into the sky, giving your freedom from the thoughts which consumed you. While your letter burns, clear your mind, say aloud or in your head, 'I let go of what no longer serves me' and lightly blow on your burning paper. By putting our positive intentions to breath, we breathe positivity and release love into the universe.


The first step to your self-love journey is underway but not complete. Keep inserting mindful moments into your daily routine and address any internal stories which may try to creep back in. Know that you are not alone in this journey. Consult your local GP or doctor for additional support, including natural remedies and holistic support.


With Love & Light - XO Jess

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